lim peh ka li kong 令伯卡你讲

Skill and style of telling stories is as per what you see - Singlish plus Hokkien dialects. Kam siah for coming into my BLOG and read, thank you! All content is copywrite "Old Beng" unless otherwise noted.

Monday, December 31, 2007

Tulan lah

lim peh ka li kong

Before carry on reading, from the title of this post, you should know it is not meant for the minors.

Let this be the last ranting of my blog for year 2007 (though my posts are seldom rants but jokes more than often).

Do you like copy cats? Do you like to have copy cats neighbours?

Knn, lim peh tell you ah, there are more than 1 copy cat staying near us.

Usually, if one were to copy another person's idea, he will do it discreetly or secretly, hoping that you will not know he is stealing your ideas BUT lim peh's 2 neighbours actually have the face to copy ideas from us and then buay pai seh one, openly showing to everyone that they copied our ideas.

My cha-bo-lang had designed our house 4 years back and guess what? The 2 kns neighbours actually renovated their houses recently (2 different units) copying some of our designs.

The neighbour on our left copied about 4 items but the neighbour on our right copied about 90% of the designs of our house.

From the handrail of our stairways, to the balcony design, to the shoe racks, to the porch holes, to the pillar-less front patio, to the entrance design leading to the kitchen, to the windows, to the sliding doors, and even to the house unit number plates etc.

Wah-piangz, copy until 出面, some more so openly coming to the front of our house standing out there like a bloody ku ku bird, staring at our design and later on, his own house was renovated just like ours, looking like a photocopy unit.

Then, when my cha-bo-lang planted a certain type of plant (the first in our neighbourhood) outside our gate, in the next few weeks, the neighbourhood will also start to have the same plant as ours. I don't wanna guess how they got the same plant but the poor plant my cha-bo-lang planted had been secretly cut in a rather crude way leaving the plant having a rather unpleasant view.

Come on, if you want to have the seeds of our plant, all you have to do is press our doorbell and ask from us and not stealing it behind our back.

I really don't know what our copy cat neighbours think cos anybody who looks at our house and then looks at their house, the similarity is so obvious. Worse than celebrities 撞衫 cos you can change your dress immediately but a renovated house?!?!?

Every time me and my cha-bo-lang go for our evening stroll after our dinner, lim peh will walk by the copy cats' house and lim peh sure @#$%&* as we walk pass the photocopy houses.

To our 2 neighbours, lim peh say 凸 凸 to both of you!

lim peh kong wan liao
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Wednesday, December 26, 2007

欠扁问答题(五)

短的几题欠扁问答题 :

家里进小偷 (猜一男艺人)

















康康 (台语)


把姜切成四片 (猜四个字)



















姜姜姜姜


最长的刀是什么刀?

















屠龙刀 (Too long 刀)


在什么地方说笑话最危险?


















海边,因为怕海 “笑”
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Wednesday, December 19, 2007

More Amazing Pictures

lim peh ka li kong

Received more funny pics from my friend, share share:

Really got driver park like that!?!?
NB! = Nabeh??


Left then Right then Left then Right then Left...

Oooops!


No eyes see!!!

Wa-lau-eh!!
lim peh kong wan liao
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Thursday, December 13, 2007

蕭敬騰 and 楊宗緯 (新不了情) / 楊宗緯 (听说爱情回来过)

萧敬腾 vs 杨宗纬
谁的 “新不了情“ 比较好?
俺个人较喜欢杨宗纬的版本。




原来男人唱 “听说爱情回来过” 可以唱到如此的动人心弦。

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Friday, December 07, 2007

Old Uncle´s Nags

lim peh ka li kong

I will be 43 come tomorrow. A middle-aged man. An old uncle.

Why am I still writing nonsensical articles in this stupid blog of mine?

Why do I bother to write the self-proclaimed funny jokes?

On the eve of my birthday, I have doubts in blogging anymore.

lim peh kong wan liao
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Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Expensive Fruit

lim peh ka li kong

One Sunday morning, me and my cha-bo-lang fetched 3 of our uncles and aunty for tim-sum.

Lim peh always like to have conversation with the elderly cos it is through conversation with them that I can learn a thing or two as they are much more knowledgeable than I.

After eating some tim-sum, all 5 of us went to a nearby Japanese Supermarket to just walk walk see see look look.

While talking and walking aimlessly, especially for me cos I had nothing to buy in mind, lim peh suddenly saw a honeydew melon.

My specs almost dropped and my eyes almost pop-out.

Why? Look at the price yourself.


S$99.00! So what if it was airflown? Lim peh will never buy such expensive honeydew melon, eat gold meh?

Guess only the RICH will pay such high price for a honeydew melon.

lim peh kong wan liao
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