lim peh ka li kong 令伯卡你讲

Skill and style of telling stories is as per what you see - Singlish plus Hokkien dialects. Kam siah for coming into my BLOG and read, thank you! All content is copywrite "Old Beng" unless otherwise noted.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The Ways To Win A Woman's Heart

lim peh ka li kong

Old Beng me sometimes see a couple, the cha-bo very swee, sexy, good figure and very chio some more and then when me look at the man besides her, Wa-lau, not good looking leh, in fact ugly is a better word to describe him.

Sometimes, it really makes me wonder why some men can have pretty women as wife?

Before I got married, I always wondered how then can a man attract a woman, in other words, what factors and characteristics must a man have in order to be able to attract a woman?

In my shallow opinion, I could only think of the following points:-

  1. Handsome Face
  2. Rich
  3. Muscular Body
  4. Able to Sweet Talk
  5. A good Cook
  6. Musical Talent - Able to play guitar, piano, violin etc
  7. Able to compose songs
  8. Big Expensive Car
  9. Humorous
  10. Smart
  11. Caring

Hmmn, let me see when I was young, how many of the above points do I have:-

1. Handsome Face : Me no got handsome face, Hum-sup face can or not? FAIL

2. Rich : Young time where got money? Always money not enough, in fact gonna give tuition to earn some pocket money. FAIL

3. Muscular Body : Only got one big round muscle which is the cluster from 6-pack but oei don't play play hor, not easy to maintain. FAIL

4. Sweet Talk : Old Beng me start my conversation with "lim peh ka li kong" and end with "lim peh kong wan liao", consider sweet bo? FAIL

5. Good Cook : Can only cook instant noodle some more not nice one. FAIL

6. Musical Talent : Zero knowledge on musical instruments. Play instrument? Play marble and catch spiders clever la. FAIL

7. Compose songs : Write compositions also got problem liao, how to compose songs? FAIL

8. Big Expensive Car : Young time where got money to buy car, big bus can or not? FAIL

9. Humorous : Self-proclaimed that I very humorous one and always try to tell joke but always sure kena back-fire and became the joker where the joke was on me (Just like Bee Gees song) FAIL

10. Smart : Don't think so, average IQ only.

11. Caring : Hmmn maybe I was caring towards my cha-bo-lang, must ask her later.

So, looking at all 11 points, think Old Beng me maybe only got 1. Sigh!!!

But I think in a relationship, it is the chemistry that counts and nothing else la.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Sunday, November 27, 2005

A Touching Story

Read one of the posting in a cyber friend's blog about a touching story, Just thought of sharing with all of you.

A touching storey

* Source from Dewi's blog *

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Friday, November 25, 2005

My Trip To Madrid and Paris

lim peh ka li kong

In February 2005, me and my cha-bo-lang went to Madrid, Spain and Paris, France.

Wa-piang, I tell you ah, we left Singapore and flew to Paris Airport and transferred another flight to Madrid Airport, a total flying time of 13 long hours.

We reached Paris Airport in the early morning 0625 hours and the temperature was about 5 degree Celsius.

After the transit to Madrid, Spain which we reached there at 1145 hrs. The Madrid Airport was rather rundown as compared to Paris Airport and when me and my cha-bo-lang walked out from the customs, we were not checked at all. (Of course la, we look so decent one).

The weather in Madrid was even colder than Paris, I reckoned it was about 2 degree Celsius at noon time. Can you imagine noon time was 2 degree celsius, how about early morning and at night?

After we took a cab to our hotel, which cost me Euro 25 dollars (equivalent to S$50) for a short distance trip of about 15 minutes, we left our luggages in our hotel room and out we left to explore Madrid and at the same time to grab for something to eat.

It was really cold and the portion of the food was very big and the best snacks in Madrid is none other than Calamari (fried squid). Until today, I have not come across anywhere which served Calamari as good as those I tasted in Madrid.

After we had our big portion of snacks, we continued to explore Madrid. It was snowing and gosh, how I loved snow. We saw a few children running and playing and screaming when the snow came down.

My cha-bo-lang told me it must be something not common to snow in Madrid since the children were overjoyed with the snow and true enough, we later learned that indeed Madrid had not snowed like that day for the past 10 - 12 years. So were we lucky or what?

During our stay in Madrid, we visited lots of beautiful parks, castles, churches but we missed the "Bull-fighting" as it was not the season for it. Thank goodness as we can't bear to watch the cruelty done onto the poor bull.

The biggest park in Madrid is none other that the "Parque del Retiro" which has 130 hectares of woodland which form a green, tree-clad (more than 15,000 trees) island in the middle of an asphalt sea.

Another place not to be missed is the Plaza Mayor and along that stretch, there are many many shops selling all types of items.

We also went to the famous Sunday Market in "Rastro" and spent a whole Sunday there. It was so packed but we had a good time bargaining on the items we liked.


One of the beautiful castle we visited in Spain. Me and my cha-bo-lang had a snowball war there.

We had our dinner in the oldest restaurant in Madrid, Botin Restaurant. The famous author of "The Old man and the Sea" Mr ErnestHemingway always had his meal there and at a specific table at the corner of the restaurant and commented that it was the best restaurant in the world. (海明威 --- 老人与海) .

The night scene in Madrid is the best in the world, no photo or picture can show its beauty, not even 50% of the actual beauty. I tell you ah, if you want a girl to fall for you, the night scene in Madrid so bo-beh-chow one, it's so romantic and just awesome.

The only set-back during our stay was the cold weather, at night it was below zero degrees.

A loving couple freezing in a cold night but still have to pose for photo taking. The cold temperature was worsen by the constant gust of wind.

Although we missed the bull-fighting (without regrets) but we did not miss the Spanish traditional dance - Flamenco dance.

At a substantial fees, we had a sumptuous dinner and got to watch the famous dance.

The dance was good but the cha-bo were not very chio though, the leading male dancer was more stylo than the female dancers.

Good Food, Nice Wine, With Loved One = A Very Happy Man.


After our 2 weeks stay in Madrid, we proceed to Paris. Paris, I presume is everybody's dream land for its romantic feeling.

We were there, and visited the main places of interests like Musee de Louvre (罗浮宫), The Eiffel Tower (巴黎铁塔), Arc de Triomphe (凯旋门), watch the famous cabarets "Moulin Rouge" and took a boat ride through the heart of Paris on the famous Bateaux Parisiens. Starting from the Eiffel Tower, the cruise follows the left bank of the Seine to the Finance Ministry at Bercy, then returns to the Eiffel Tower along the right bank, passing by most of the famous and beautiful buildings in Paris.

To be honest, both me and my cha-bo-lang prefer Madrid to Paris. Anyway, preference is always very subjective, ultimately it is not the "where" you go but the "who" you go with.

Inside Musee de Louvre Museum looking out of the Pyramid glass roof.



The famous portrait of Mona Lisa


The BIG face and Old Beng

Women's best pal - LV Bags (Anybody interested can carry them back, provided you have the strength)

Arc de Triomphe

The Eiffel Tower lights up and flickers at night in the interval of every hour for about 10 minutes. It is much more beautiful than the pic.

Eiffel Tower from far

The quality of the photo shots did not turn out very well cos both me and my cha-bo-lang are no pro photographers but the beautiful sceneries we have seen are always in our memories..... forever.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Thursday, November 24, 2005

狮城怪谈 (四)

(1989年之旧著)

=====

当你很不幸地遇到鬼时,你会有什么感觉呢?也许你会被吓得魂飞魄散吧!然而,小孩子遇见鬼时又有什么反应呢?或许由于他们根本不知道是什么,因此不感到害怕,也可能因为如此,天真无邪的小孩遇见鬼的较大人的多吧。。。。。

=====

小孩与鬼

小宝是一个四岁半的小男孩,长得白白胖胖,时常嘟着小嘴巴对着别人笑,因此常常令邻居的叔叔和阿姨们忍不住地想抱他、亲他。年级较大的伯伯和婆婆们都喜欢捏他的圆圆的面颊,摸他那可爱的小头。

小宝总喜欢坐在门口外玩耍,通常都是独自一人坐在那儿看行人们走来走去,每次邻居们走过时,他都会叫人,这更使得邻居们更喜欢逗他玩。

住在四楼的陈伯最疼爱小宝,每当他经过小宝的身旁时,总会摸一摸小宝的头发,还给他一粒糖。

或许是因为有糖吃的原因吧,小宝最喜欢楼上的陈伯,当然,小孩子总是喜欢别人哄他的。

几乎每天傍晚,陈伯都会给小宝一粒糖,这已成为他们俩之间的一种心灵间的默契。

到了夜晚,小宝的母亲也会和他有一句没一句的闲聊。

“小宝,今天见到陈伯伯吗?”母亲拥抱着小宝半躺在沙发上说道。

“有啊!陈伯伯他也给我一粒糖吃,好好吃。”小宝露出笑容答道。

“你真贪吃哦。”母亲一边说一边亲着小宝那带有奶香味的颈项,弄得小宝不停地咯咯笑着。。。。。

x x x x x

几个星期后的一个傍晚。。。。。

小宝独自一人坐在门外玩耍,正闷得有点不耐烦时,他见到陈伯伯由楼上走了下来。

“陈伯伯。”小宝咧着小嘴巴说道。

陈伯伯走到小宝身边用手轻轻地抚摸着他的头发。

“小宝今天乖不乖?”陈伯以充满爱怜的声调温和地问小宝。

“乖,小宝很乖很乖。”小宝抬着头答道。

“小宝,陈伯伯今天没有糖给你吃,你气不气?”

“不气。我已经长大了,不再喜欢吃糖。”小宝以大人的口气答道。

“哈。。。”陈伯看到小宝强调自己是大人的语气,忍不住大笑起来。“小宝,陈伯伯要出去一下,再见啦。”

“陈伯伯,再见。”小宝摇晃着他那胖胖的小手说道。

小宝晃着小手直至陈伯远远地蹒跚而去。

x x x x x

“妈妈,我今天见到陈伯伯了。”小宝对着母亲说。

“是不是又给你糖吃啦?”母亲摸了摸他的小脸蛋问道。

“没有啊,陈伯伯今天没给我糖吃,我已经长大了嘛!”

“是啦,小宝长大了。”母亲笑道。

“其实陈伯也蛮可怜的,自己一个人住。”父亲在一旁说道。

“爸爸,陈伯伯的儿子女儿呢?为什么他们不理陈伯伯呢?”小宝张着一双大眼睛问道。

“陈伯伯的儿子女儿们结婚了都不想和他们的父亲住,你以后结婚了会不会不要妈妈和我呢?”父亲抱着小宝问道。

“不会,我一定会和你们同住的。”小宝一本严肃的说。

父母亲两人见到小宝贑直的脸孔,不禁笑了起来。。。。。

x x x x x

第二天、第三天傍晚,陈伯伯照样地下楼来与小宝谈话,他每次都很爱怜地摸着小宝的头发。

第四天下午,住在陈伯隔壁的王先生嗅到一股令人作呕的腐烂臭味,而这股臭味正从陈伯的屋里传出来。

在敲了陈伯的门大约十分钟后,王先生实在忍受不了由陈伯家里传出来的臭味,便打电话报警。

在警察到来撞开门后,发现到陈伯的尸体在客厅中。

法医检验后,证实陈伯在客厅跌倒撞伤了头部,已死去一个多星期了。

当小宝的父母亲知晓着件事后,都惊吓得不知所措。如果说陈伯已死去一个多星期,那小宝这几天所见到岂不是陈伯的鬼魂?自此过后,小宝的母亲再也不让小宝离开她身边半步。

陈伯的儿女们知晓陈伯逝世后,都纷纷赶回来办理丧事。

陈伯的大儿子的一位女同事,这晚,带着六岁的女儿小芬前来吊丧。

陈伯的灵堂就搭在楼下的草地,只见来吊丧的人都一言不发地坐在那儿。

陈伯的儿女们都蹲坐在一旁守柩,两个女儿更是两眼布满红丝。

忽然陈伯的大儿子发觉身后有人拉他的袖子,回头一看,原来是小芬。

“什么事呀,小芬?”大儿子问道。

“叔叔,我想小便。”小芬小小声的对他说。

“这样啊。妳上去四楼我的家里的厕所吧。楼上没有人,妳会上去吗?”

“会!我上去了。”小芬说完便独自一人爬上楼梯上楼去。”

不一会儿,小芬从楼上下来。

当她经过陈伯的遗照时,只见她停住了脚步,看着陈伯摆在灵堂框前的遗照。

陈伯的大儿子这时走了过来,问小芬:“怎样?尿完了吗?”

“嗯,叔叔啊,刚才我在楼上见到这位伯伯正在门口扫地。”小芬指着陈伯的遗照说道。

陈伯的大儿子听后大吃一惊,连忙问道:“小芬,妳是看错人了,小孩子不可以说骗话的,知道吗?”

“我没说骗话。我真的见到他在扫地,而且他还跟我笑呢。”小芬说道。

这时,小芬的母亲刚好经过听到,便说:“小芬,谁对妳笑了?”

陈伯的大儿子对小芬的母亲说了一遍小芬所遇到的事,小芬的母亲马上变得面无血色。

“我看我们一起到楼上去看看吧。”陈伯的大儿子说道。他叫了几位男同事便和小芬的母亲一同爬上四楼去。

当他们抵达四楼时,只觉得四周围阴沉沉的,有说不出的诡异。

虽然不见任何东西,各人的心里都不竟感到骇怕,只在四楼随意巡视一下便急急地下楼去。。。。。

x x x x x

后语:

这件事情的真实性有多少?

我可以肯定的说是百分之百,因为其中一个小孩是我的亲戚,而且我相信小孩子是不会说谎的,你说是吗?

(故事四完)

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Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Lau Hero's 1st Chinese Blog

lim peh ka li kong

My blogger friend, Mr Lao Hero, did his first Chinese blog which I personnally find it better than his English ones.

Since he mentioned about Old Beng in it, I shall link it here for all to read.
* source from "lau hero" *

He also talked about Qin Shi Huang and Spinnee. Think he can write more of his opinion on other bloggers too.

Lau hero, keep writing.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Old Beng at the Car Park

lim peh ka li kong

Last weekend, me and my cha-bo-lang went to Suntec City to do some pre-Christmas shopping. Siong man, must buy many X'mas presents, pocket gonna burn one big hole again liao.

While driving along AYE, me suay suay kena driving behind a "Ku" mar-say-lee (Tortoise driver). Wa-piang, can you believe it, driving at express way lane 1 doing at 60 only. Wa-Kaoz, me beamed the driver but the tortoise never care my beaming and continue to drive like his grandfather's road, just like a tortoise - slow and steady.

I mean, yeah, there are always some very careful drivers la but please, doing only 60 on lane one express way?

I think every time I very suay, always kena the following situation:- when I am in a hurry, I sure meet slow drivers and at every traffic light I reach sure to turn red; when I am not in the hurry, the whole journey hyper smooth, no slow drivers, no traffic jam and no red light always green light;

Anyway, after a while I knew the mar-say-lee driver would not give way, me bo-bian had to overtake him and while me overtook the mar-say-lee, me took a glimpse at the driver. Wa-lau eh, old uncle driving, the face look a bit like the famous MAD magazine character but the passenger sitting beside the driver was a very chio-bu.

Many times, me always see the man of a couple very fat, ugly and old while his partner very young, sweet, pretty, good figure and hyper chio. Why like that ah? Is it that's why men must study high high and get a high high pay job then will automatic able to tackle chio-bu? (Think when people see me and my cha-bo-lang together, they probably also have the same thinking: 鲜花牛粪 , beauty and the beast, ha ha.)

After a while, we reached Suntec and me drove into the basement carpark. I think Suntec Car park is one of the biggest one in town with many many parking lots but then hor, every time me go there, sure very difficult to find car park lot leh.

When me drove into the car park after the barrier, me saw a BMW 7-series waiting at the side so me over-take it and drove along the whole stretch of car park lots.

Those who had been to Suntec will know that the Car park stretches a long way from one end to the other. While I almost reached the end of basement one, me saw a car coming out from a parking lot. Heng ah, so lucky to be able to get a lot so quickly.

After me reversed into the lot and got down from our car, me saw the BMW 7-series which was waiting near the Car park entrance driving very fast towards us. When it reached us, the driver, a young man came out of his BMW and told me to get out from the lot cos he had been waiting for it for half an hour liao. The conversation between us went like this:-

"Hello, uncle, I wait for this parking lot very long already, how can you just come and take my lot?"

"Hello mister, what take your lot? You were waiting near the entrance there and from there to here is like 200 to 300 metres apart, what do you mean I take your lot?"

"I waited from the starting point of the Car park lots and the whole stretch also "chorp" by me so you cannot park."

"Huh? You mean you waited right from there some 200 over metres away and all the lots on this level are assuming under your reserve? Nobody can park except you?"

"Yeah, you are right. You have to come out and let me park."

I couldn't help but started to laugh until my tears also come out. What nonsense was he saying? Just because he was waiting near the entrance of the Car park, the whole stretch of parking lots are under his waiting?

"Hello mister, you are not been rational, where got people like that "chorp" parking lot one? Try waiting a bit longer la."

"If you don't move your car, don't blame me if later you found your car kena vandalised."

"Ha ha, you got guts, you try lor. One more dent or not makes no different to it. Anyway, young man, it's is very unreasonable to claim all the parking lots are "chorp" by you just by simply saying you are waiting there so the whole stretch also under your chorp."

After saying so, me and my cha-bo-lang walked away. What kind of crap was that, come on, if I took a parking lot near him, I am unreasonable but a far distance of 200 over metres away from where he was waiting?

Just then, another car pulled out from a parking lot opposite where we were standing. The young man saw the empty lot and quickly ran towards his car and wanted to take the lot. Before he could even drive his BMW, another car, a Lexus, overtook him and head-in and took the parking lot.

I could see that the young BMW driver really very angry and again he came out from his car and walked towards the Lexus. Think he wanted to call that Lexus driver to give the parking lot to him.

Me and my cha-bo-lang did not bother to stay back to listen to their quarrel and went for our shopping happily, at least for my wife.

Anyway, later when I went to collect my car after our shopping, my car was in good condition and guess what, the Lexus was still parking there and the BMW 7-series was nowhere to be seen, think the Lexus driver also bo-chap that BMW driver.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Monday, November 21, 2005

(十五年前之旧著)

人生在世,似乎是永无止境的累。

小时候,读书读到好累好累,只要一拿出课本,我的天,好累。 玩耍却不见得会累,奇怪?!

追求女孩子时怎样也不觉得累,仿佛是金刚不坏之身。 一结婚后,连周末与公共假期都懒得出去一趟,理由----累!

累,其实是一个很好的理由与借口。

做工做到黑夜白昼不分,一整天在外头奔波,一回到家整个人垮了下来。

有时多希望一觉睡下去不用在隔天清晨再爬起来飞扑上公司。

日做夜做,生理上,心理上都觉得累。却又无可奈何,为了那五斗米,累又能怎样?

有时想一想,自己也觉得悲哀,这么累为了什么?薪水又不是一个月一万八千,却累得不分东南西北,前后左右。

日复一日,年复一年的奔波,心底的累越积越多,总有一天会整个人无法再负担而倒下来。那种令你感到沮丧的累你试过吗?当夜晚躺在床上望着天花板时,不禁问自己,“那么累到底为了什么?”

我想世上并不是只是我一个人感到累吧?你我他彼此都感到好累好累,只是大家没说出口而已。

日累夜累,却还是得继续累下去,或许生活就是如此而已。。。。。。累。

x x x x x

2005 后语:

十五年后的今天,重读,犹记得当时真是累。还好,现在虽然生活逼人,但比起从前还是好的。累了,有个家能回,有个人能让彼此依靠,有时侯,无需语言,一个眼神,一个拥抱,就已足够,嗯。

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Friday, November 18, 2005

Dogs Do The Silliest Things

To enlarge, click on individual picture.











** Source from "Dogs Do The Silliest Things" - Author: Alexandra Ortolja-Baird (publisher MQ Publications Limited) **

Dogs.......... :)

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Thursday, November 17, 2005

狮城怪谈 (三)

(1989年之旧著)

四周一片宁静,虫声唧唧,大地仿佛在沉睡,此刻,我却为了三餐而得挨夜加班。虽然,这已不是第一次值夜班,可是,夜里办公室一片寂静的气氛,却令人毛骨梀然,骇怕万分。。。。。

=====

办公室惊魂

=====

我的名字叫童字光。

我在一家出入口贸易公司工作;由于有些时候,飞机半夜才降落,而顾客又急于需要所运来的货,因此我总得在半夜回到公司加班。

没办法,顾客至上。

白天,我有几名书记和一名女助手,如果你有机会到我的办公室来,一定惊讶白天与
夜晚的差别。

白天的热烘烘和夜晚的冷清清是两个极端。

忘了是谁曾说过这么一句话:“ 有男人的地方一定有香烟;有女人的地方一定有嘈声。”

哈,说的真妙。

我的办公室就是如此:白天一片吵杂,夜晚宁静无比。

我的电脑与一切文件全部在二楼;搂下是仓库。

由搂下通至搂上是一个圆形的楼梯---那种古老的建筑。

还记得当我第一次见到这楼梯时,心里突然浮现一种诡异的感觉:有一些新鲜感同时又有一种莫明的恐惧感。当时心中忽然涌现不祥的预感,一种酷似凶兆的第六感。

果然在几个月之后,发生了一次意外。。。。。

x x x x x

“阿成,拿这份文件去楼下给老陈。” 我的助手珍妮对Officer Boy说道。

“没问题,立刻送去。” 阿成连跑带跳地拿了文件便跑下楼去。

“这个阿成总是那么不定性。” 珍妮边摇头边对着我说。

忽然由楼梯处传来一阵跌碰声和阿成的惊叫声。

“哎。。。呀。。。” 楼下传来阿成微弱的呻吟声。

当我和珍妮跑下楼去时,见到阿成正坐在地上,双手紧抓住左腿,冷汗直冒。

“怎样?” 我低下头问阿成。

“哎。。。哎,我的左腿断了。” 阿成呻吟道。此时,老陈也走了过来。

“别乱动,我马上去打电话召救护车。” 老陈说完便去打电话。

不一会儿,救伤车来了。忙了一阵子,阿成被抬去医院。

x x x x x

当阿成的断腿痊愈后,头一天上班便呈上他的辞职信。

“怎么会想辞职?” 我望着他问道。

“没什么,只是想换换环境。” 阿成说道。

“你考虑一下吧。”

“嗯。” 阿成敷衍答道。

珍妮这时也走了过来。

“嗨,阿成,你的腿好点了吗?那天你怎么会滚下去?”

“我。。。那天。。。” 阿成一副欲语还休的样子。

“什么事这样吞吞吐吐的,别婆妈了。” 珍妮道。

“那天当我下楼时,走到一半,忽然一阵阴风从四周吹了过来。” 阿成吸了一口气后说道。“然后我忽然感觉到背后好象有人逼近我。在我未来得及转过头去看时,在我背后突然有人用力推了我一下,就这样我失去重心,滚了下去。”

“那天除了你之外,根本没人跟着你下去。” 珍妮吓到脸色发白问道。

“是吗?也许是吧!” 阿成耸了耸肩说道。

当珍妮楞在那儿时,我的另外两名书记,雪利和南丝走了过来邀她去吃午餐。

在她们三人去吃午餐时,我享有一小时宁静的办公室。

可惜,一小时好快便已飞逝了。

在珍妮她们三人还在楼下时,她们的嬉笑声早已如浪潮般直轰了上来。

“唉!耳朵又得受罪。” 我心里叹了一口气。

果然,嘈声马上向我围攻,令我招架不住,可说是暂时性失去听觉。

“老板,阿成他是被女鬼推下去的。” 雪利第一个在我耳边进攻。

“是啊,真是有女鬼!” 珍妮也不甘示弱,立即加入“攻势”。

“胡说八道!那儿有鬼?哈,妳们真是神通广大,竟然还知道是女鬼?” 我望着她们三人问道。

“什么胡说八道,是真的,那天我很早便抵达公司,我是第一个人进来。我在楼下的楼梯处刚要上楼来时,抬头见到一名身穿白衣的长发女人正站在二楼处。” 雪利睁大双眼说道。

“当时的我吓了一跳,不敢独自上来,连忙走去仓库等你们来。” 雪利继续说:“那天续我之后便是老板你来得最早。”

“哦,那天我记得妳整个人魂不守舍,我还问妳是不是生病。” 我说道。

“对,对,对,就是那天。”雪利点头猛道:“我还记得那天我们上来后,办公室根本没有人。”

“还有啊,” 南丝也插上一脚说道:“有一次中午我不舒服没去吃午餐,独自一人在办公室里休息,忽然由楼下转来一阵阵的哭泣声,哭得很凄凉而且越来越大声。我以为是珍妮还是雪利在哭便走下楼去看看,却不见有人。”

南丝说完便静了下来,有趣的是珍妮和雪利也同时静了下来。

哈,真是神奇,三个女人在一块儿竟然回连一点声音也没有。

“哇!!” 我突然大喊一声。

哇!!!” 三名女人被我突如其来的叫声吓了一跳,齐齐喊了起来。

我的天!屋子差点塌了下来,三个女人的惊叫声叠在一起真可说是惊天动地,空前绝后。

在她们的喊叫声后,我的双耳转来阵阵的鸣鸣声,真的是女人的喊叫声,名不虚传。

“你做什么大叫?” 珍妮一手按住胸口说道。

“就是,你怪叫什么?” 雪利和南丝双双把双眼张的大大对着我怒问。

“对不起,和你们玩玩。” 我举起手做投降壮。

“好了,回去做工。” 珍妮见了,便替我解围。

x x x x x

黎明。

我把车泊好后便冒着雨直奔向仓库。

这场小雨从昨夜便一直下到现在。唉!这种天气最好便是睡觉,我却必须在黎明时分冒着雨来上班,可怜的我。

在漆黑中跑向仓库,当我到达门口时,正拿出锁匙打开大锁时,听到里头传来一阵女人的啜泣声,而且仿似哭泣得很凄凉。

咦?里头怎会有人在哭泣?

心里忽然想到南丝曾说到她听到女人的哭泣声和她们所谈过的鬼魂之谈,一阵莫明的恐惧感忽然涌上心头。

怎么样?我该不该开门进去?

这世上当真有鬼?

一定是我听错了,现在科学这么昌明怎会有这些无稽之谈?

但是那哭声那么清楚地由里头传了出来。

把锁头打开了,我以冒着冷汗的手心紧握着门柄,心里七上八下,不知该不该把门打开。

童字光啊童字光,你几时变得这么懦弱?这世上那儿有鬼?你还有很多工作等着你去做,怎么还这么婆妈?

我咬了咬牙根,把门打开,走了进去。。。。。

一进门我马上把电灯开着。

只见仓库里空无一人,只有货物。

慢着,那扇门怎会这样?

只见那通向二楼的门正在徐徐地关上,就象是有人刚推开那扇门走上二楼去。

“谁?” 我叫了一声,快步冲向那扇门。

我开了楼梯处的灯然后走进去,抬头望了上去。

在二楼处我刚好见到一件白衣裙的裙角闪了一闪。

我连跑带跳奔上二楼。

那儿有人?

一定是我太累,眼花。

把外套脱下,我立即投入我的工作里。

繁忙的工作令我暂时忘了所发生的事,心中的疑虑与恐惧也暂且丢在一旁。

时间一分一秒过去。

正当我正在埋头苦干时,楼梯处传来一阵有人走动的声音,我不禁感到奇怪,整间公司只有我自己一个人,哪来的第二者?难道进贼了?

我把手上的笔丢下,赶忙跑向楼梯处往下望。

啊!又是那白衣裙角扬了一扬。

当我冲下楼去时,老陈刚好从仓库门口走了进来。

“早,老童。” 老陈对我打个招呼。

“早,你可有见到什么人由楼上下来吗?” 我问老陈。

“没有啊,我只见到你下来。” 老陈说道:“发生了什么事?”

“没什么。” 看来是我眼花。

当我正转过身想上楼去时,老陈忽然叫住了我。

“老童,你见到了什么?” 老陈一脸沉重问道。

“我。。。我听到了有女人的哭泣声。。。而且我好象见到了一个女人。。。我不敢肯定;大概是我眼花。”

“你没眼花,因为我也曾见过。” 老陈说道。

啊!我简直不敢相信自己的耳朵。那么,这世上真有鬼。南丝她们也没说谎,这间公司真有不干净的东西。

“那天晚上,我留下做夜班,那时我就坐在这儿。忽然楼上传来一阵打字的声音,当时你们全下班了,楼上根本没有人。” 老陈说到这儿,珍妮和雪利也来上班了,两人听到老陈的话双双都站在那儿听老陈继续说下去。

“我心里有数,便置之不理,继续做我的事。过了一会儿,打字的声音停止了。又过了大约半小时,我总算把我的工作做完了,我拿了一份文件到楼上去复印。”

“你还敢上楼去?”雪利瞪大双眼问道。

老陈望了望她,继续说:“我拿了文件上楼时,走到一半,我见到一名穿白衣裙的女子慢慢地向着 我走过来。”

“啊!” 珍妮与雪利吓得彼此紧靠在一起。

“只见她望着我,以一双哀怨的眼睛看着我,仿佛有许多话要对我倾诉。” 老陈点了一根烟说道:“她就站在我面前静静地看着我,象似有话对我说却不出一声,我被吓得呆立在那儿与她对望。过了好一会儿,才恢复正常。我立即掉过头跑下楼,逃出仓库。当我在外头锁门时,听到里头传来哭泣声,我一刻也不想再呆在那儿便急急忙忙离开了。”

老陈说完后,每个人都静静不出声,四周的气氛透出一股很诡异的感觉。

“Hi! 大家早!”南丝此时走了进来,她的那一声 “狮子吼” 把大家吓了一跳。

“怎么了?” 南丝见大伙儿吓了一跳,不禁问道。

“没事,没事,开工了。” 我拍了拍手,然后转过身上楼去。

当我上楼时,背后传来珍妮她们三人的喃喃细语。

“有一次我听到那复印机自动操作,而且不止一次呢。” 南丝对着她们说道。

“是啊,这间公司真有点邪门,有时我的文具会无缘无故不见,这一刻刚在我桌上,下一刻就不见了。” 雪利说道。

我回过头瞪了她们一眼,因为我知道如果她们继续谈论下去,今天可不用工作了。

珍妮见了便拉了拉其余二位的衣袖,细声说:“喂,别再说了,老板不高兴了。”

看了我的脸色后,三人才乖乖不再吭一声,各自回到自己的岗位工作。

x x x x x

上个月的公共假期屠妖节由于有一顾客急着要一批货。而飞机又在当天早上抵达新加坡,我只得牺牲一天公共假期回公司工作。

虽然是大白天,但一想到公司里有着不干净的东西,心里不禁有点害怕。

忙了整个上午,幸好一切正常,什么事也没发生。

当我正在抽一根烟小憩时,旁边的复印机忽然操作起来。

那一声又一声的移动声使我坐立不安。

我冲上前去把电插头拔了下来,没有了电力,复印机马上停止操作。

我以手背檫了檫头额上冒出的汗,安慰着自己:“没事,不过机器发生故障而已,没事的。”

看了看那复印机,我重重地跌坐在椅子上。

此时,我桌上的电话响了起来。

在宁静的办公室里,铃声分外响亮,我不禁吓了一大跳。

天啊!不可能的,没理由会响的。

我公司里的电话是那种可打出来,也可让公司里的职员做室内交谈,那种英语叫 “Inter-Calling”。

从外头打进来和Inter-Calling的电话响声是不同的,而且Inter-Calling时,电话机上的红灯会闪亮,因此很容易分辩是外头打进来还是办公室里职员们的Inter-Calling。

此时,我桌上的电话机响时,正是显示着是 Inter-Calling。

不可能的!

整间公司就只有我一人,公共假期根本没有人会回来。

那电话响声还在一声一声的响亮着,似乎在催我拿起听筒。

我以发着抖的右手慢慢伸前去,心里恐惧万分,不知道我该不该拿起电话听筒?

就在此时,响声停止了。

四周又再回复清静,静得有点怕人,我甚至于可以听到自己的猛烈心跳声。

“没事,电话故障罢了。” 我安慰着自己。天知道当时我有多害怕,根本不相信会这么巧,复印机故障,电话机也故障。

电话机此时又再响了起来。

啊!又是 Inter-Calling!

我拿起听筒还没出声,从那一端传来令我害怕又熟悉的哭泣声。

那阵哭泣声一声一声地传来,我不禁感到全身乏力,手脚冰冻,心跳不止,感觉到我的血全涌上头顶使我头皮发麻。

“谁?” 我大喊一声。仿佛想借着喊叫声掩盖恐惧。

“呜。。。。。” 哭泣声还是连续不断。

我扔下听筒,马上冲下楼去。

一个人影也没有,整间仓库就只有我一人。

我倚靠在墙上喘着气。

此时,仓库的电话也响了起来。

又是 Inter-Calling!

我几乎是立时便拿起听筒喊道:“谁!”

还是没有声音,只是那令我疯狂的哭泣声,我再也忍受不了,扔下电话听筒便冲出仓库,头也不敢回。。。。。

自此之后,我总会拉着老陈和我一起工作,特别是夜晚和公共假期。我再也没有勇气独自一人留在公司里;顾客虽然重要,我却也不必为他们而心惊胆跳,毕竟顾客是顾客,我是我,我不能为他们而受惊吓。生意是生意,我不能因为生意而经神崩溃,永远不能。。。。。

(故事三完)

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Sunday, November 13, 2005

Bloggers' Night Karaoke KTV Session

lim peh ka li kong

Last night, we had our bloggers' night karaoke KTV organised by Qin Shi Huang at the Toa Payoh SAFRA Club from 7 pm to 2 am.

The 5 confirmed showing their faces were Qin Shi Huang, Ipromise, Xorpheus, Monkichi and Old Beng me but 2 other persons also turn up - Xishi and my cha-bo-lang which made a total of 7 persons singing all night long.

Monkichi; Qin Shi Huang; Xorpheus; Xishi; Old Beng; Cha-bo-lang (left to right)

Monkichi; Qin Shi Huang; Ipromise; Xishi; Old Beng; Cha-bo-lang (left to right)

The ealiest bird was Ipromise followed by Old Beng and cha-bo-lang. As usual emperor was late (Piang, organisor also late BUT I already got used to it) Anyway the first half an hour was all to the 3 of us.

All of us showed our singing skills and of course there were some very good ones, wa-piang like listening to CD, especially Xishi, no horse run. If Xishi were the Karaoke Queen, then the title of Karaoke King that night was none other then Ipromise.

The worst singer was * ... drum-roll... * Old Beng me. Ha ha! Actually quite pity the others to have to endure my torturing of my singing. Think I can be part-time torturing terrorists with my singing at their ears.

My singing condition was bad due to the following reasons:-

1) My coughing still persist and my throat was really not suitable to sing; (But you know, everybody had to pay so if no sing, then lugi one so bo-bian must sing at least a few songs la)

2) The last time me and my cha-bo-lang went for Karaoke session was 3 years ago thus without practice our singing skills, if any, already rusty. (Horrible singing plus coughing halfway also don't care la, anyway they were the ones being tortured, not me :p)

3) A bit too shy to sing in front of the Karaoke Queen and King;

There were a few climaxes during our session which I must share with you:-

1) A mini-concert was performed by Monkichi with her tribute to Teresa Teng 邓丽君. Monkichi really sang like Teresa Teng.

2) Old Beng sang but forgot to bring his ladder cos he couldn't reach the high note without the ladder and eventually his voice broke and sang out of tune and 走音 until reached JB.

3) Xorpheus and Qin did some songs on BeeGees and man, really good until Old Beng me started to join in to sing "Tragedy". It was really a tragedy to all until Xishi the queen could not take it anymore and puke. To protest, she showed us her "No Eyes See" posture.

4) Old Beng and cha-bo-lang also did a few Duets and me sang badly but luckily my cha-bo-lang sang well and think probably the others knew that if they were to criticise my singing, I will show them my tiger and eagle so nobody dared to even show their slightest discontentment when we sang. Happy couples cos nobody dared not to applause.

5) Ipromise and my cha-bo-lang sang "Endless Love" and my oh my, they duet better than me leh. (No photo cos they scared I see already angry, but no la me where got angry just because of 1 LOVE song?) Actually while they were singing, me took the opportunity to go and sit between 2 pretty girl girl - Monkichi and Xishi. 6) Old Beng, think I was a bit drunk, started to dance when a few fast number songs were sung and how do I fare? Think my dancing was better than my singing and my blogging. (No photo was taken cos everyone was laughing so badly and could not possibly take photo with shaking hands)

Last but not least, here are some of the great photos.

The Four heavenly kings 四大天王 (Xorpheus, Ipromise, Qin Shi Huang and Old Beng)
The Charlie's Angels or Power Puff Girls? (Monkichi, Xishi and Cha-bo-lang) Sorry, no photo for this one.

Beauty and the beast (Old Beng and Xishi)
Old man and Young man (Old Beng and Xorpheus)

Karaoke Queen (Xishi)
Karaoke King (Ipromise)
Xorpheus singing
Emperor choosing songs (Qin Shi Huang)
Monkichi and Xishi - the best Duets in Town.
Following credits must be given to the following persons:-

Qin Shi Huang : For his great effort for organising the Karaoke night. We really enjoyed ourselves, kam siah brother.

Xishi : Melodious voice and good singing entertainment from her with the different types of songs she sang (Faye Wong 王菲,Jay Chou 周杰伦,Duet with Monkichi singing the male's portion)

Ipromise : Good manly voice and sang a variety of English, Mandarin , Cantonese songs. Credit definitely must go to his last song "Tonight will you come - 今夜你会不会来" which he dedicated to each and everyone.

Xorpheus : Jovial guy who sang nice songs and dared to duet with Old Beng me. And most importantly, he was our camera man.

Monkichi : English, Mandarin, Cantonese, Hokkien songs all sang by her. A real talented Karaoke singer.

Cha-bo-lang : Duet with Old Beng me and brought back the good old memories which we had.

After our Karaoke session last night, Xorpheus announced to arrange for the next Bloggers' gathering and no, don't worry, all are spared from my singing and we have decided without any objection to go for bowling instead. Good choice cos you will not be tortured by Old Beng's singing again.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Friday, November 11, 2005

Happy Mood

lim peh ka li kong

Wasn't very happy lately due to the following reasons:-
  1. Maid went back to her country for 2 weeks holiday;
  2. Office work getting more due to the incompetence of another colleague;
  3. Kena Road tax and car insurance = money no enough;
  4. Coughing for the past 2 - 3 weeks;

Then, received 1 piece of GOOD news this morning and now I feel very very very very very happppppppy. WOOHOO :)))))))

Life is beautiful, life is good, life is shiok.

Want to let it all out and announce to the whole world: Me very happpppppyyyyy!!!!

Bonus: Weekend coming, no work, double WOOHOO :D

Additional bonus: Will be meeting up with some bloggers tomorrow for the first time. Anymore friends interested to join our bloggers' night organised by Qin Shi Huang. Read this for more details. Currently there are only 5 confirm, think we can take in more.

lim peh kong wan liao

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Thursday, November 10, 2005

A Dream

After I disclosed my true identity, many friends of mine started to ask me the reason for doing so? Even my wife questioned me on my motive, and she is one who reads but does not really care what I blogged.

It has been taunting me since then and at one time I even asked myself whether I had made the right decision in doing so but what is done cannot be undone.

Think this issue is really eating into me to the extend that I actually had a bizarre dream.

I dreamed that I was at home sitting in front of my computer writing Old Beng's tales when my wife told me that I had visitors. When I went to the door I saw an uncle standing outside my gate and with him was an army of children. (Have to use the word army cos that was how I felt when I saw them in my dream).

"Yes, can I help you?"

"lim peh ka li kong, I am Old Beng and these are my children." The uncle told me and all the 12 children greeted me loudly. "We come here to see you is to ask you why you want to delete us away? We do nothing wrong and also do no harm to anyone what? You know I even don't scold bad words one unlike some other bloggers who use vulgarity like nobody's business?"

"But....but I didn't delete you what?" I started to sweat when I faced Old Beng cos I could see his tiger and eagle on his arms.

"Yes, you did. You told the whole world that Old Beng does not exist and only you made it all up. You tell me now how? Where can we go? I have my cha-bo-lang and 12 children with me and we don't even have a place to stay now. What have we done to offend you? You cannot one day suka suka created me and my family and then another day delete us away, it's not fair to us. you know or not, now I even got fans who want to see me and my tattoo and ...."

"Old Beng, relax. I never say I will discard you neither did I say I will delete you. I will still let you have your say in my blog as and when you like."

"But it's never same again one la, by telling the world I do not exist and just a psodomy....pseu... don't know what you call la, you are hurting me badly. I think it is not right by disclosing openly even without asking my opinion. Furthermore, I think you got popular because of Old Beng me and my family and my tattoo and...."

"Eh...Old Beng, I didn't mean it to be that way you know? All that I am saying is that I may wish to touch on certain topics which I don't think you can comprehend thus I require myself to be blogging instead of you."

"You talk what? What topics lim peh cannot talk one? I everything also can talk and if I cannot talk I will get my cha-bo-lang to help me talk one."

"I...I..."

"No need I la, I want to tell the whole world that Old Beng and his family do exist and it is you who do not exist. Maybe you do not exist, Old Beng exists and created you and not you exist and created me."

At that moment, I woke up.

Gosh! What has becoming of me? Am I too engrossed in my own creation thus unconsciously having a double personality? Am I really existing and created Old Beng or like what he said in my dream - the other way round? It is he who exists and created me instead?

Hope I do not require the help of any psychologist or psychiatrist.

Anybody out there who can interpret dreams? Please share your opinion.

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Wednesday, November 09, 2005

狮城怪谈二 (中 / 下)

故事 二 (中)

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天旋地转 电梯里阴风阵阵

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“陈小姐,根据我的检查后,发觉妳一点事也没有,一切正常。”医生对着丽珍说。

“但是我每晚都头痛,而且一次比一次疼痛。”丽珍说道。

医生续而问道:“妳说每晚都会头痛?那到底是几时开始的?”

丽珍思索了一会儿说道:“大约是一个星期吧,而且每晚差不多都是同样时间都感到头痛。”

医生托了托眼镜框:“每晚同样时间?这样吧,我写封信推荐妳去给专科医生检验一下,也许能检查出什么病?”

丽珍拿了医生的信后,便回家休息了。

接下来的几个晚上,丽珍的头痛到了极点,使她觉得整个头仿佛要裂开来似的。

连续不断的疼痛使丽珍几乎崩溃,只见她一天比一天憔悴。

终于,到专科医院检查的日子到临了。

经过一连串复杂的检查与照X光,最终的结论还是一切正常,根本毫无丝毫的毛病。

除了吃药,还是吃药,试过无数种止痛药,还是无法减轻疼痛。

直到后来,一夜睡眠的时间不过区区两三个小时。

而在她两三个小时的睡眠中又经常梦到那位撑着一把伞的长发女人。

如此这般折腾了一个多月,在一个夜晚,丽珍奇迹的不再头疼,也不再梦到那个令她感到心寒的女人。

一连十多天也平静地渡过。

美玲甚至于强拉丽珍一同去庙院烧香,求平安。

一切看来已恢复正常。

至少,在她们心中认为一切已恢复正常,她们并不晓得暴风雨来临的前一刻是最平静的。

直至有一晚,美玲与丽珍一同去喝一位同事的喜酒。。。

x x x x x

“美玲,快点啦,电梯来了,赶快出来,我们要迟到了。”丽珍站在电梯口看着电梯正在楼下升上来。

一会儿,电梯到了。当电梯的门开时,丽珍听到美玲的关门声和她的喊叫声:“来了!来了!急什么嘛,反正人们去喝喜酒总是迟到的。”

当丽珍正在提步踏进电梯时,看到上次那柄雨伞正横置在电梯当中。

刹那间,丽珍只觉得天旋地转,仿佛坠入冰库中。

“妳怎么愣在那儿?”美玲边走边说。

就在此时,电梯门已慢慢地合上。

“哎!妳怎么没按着钮?现在又得等多一会了。”

“啊!我。。。我一时之间忘了按,我们走楼梯下去吧。”

“我。。。”美玲还没开口说话便已被丽珍拉着下楼去。

一路上,美玲发觉到丽珍心事重重,叫了她几声也没注意到。

美玲推了推丽珍的手肘,说道:“丽珍,妳怎么了?瞧妳魂不守舍,有什么事吗?”

“啊,没什么,只是觉得有点累而已。”丽珍不想吓着美玲便以累做为藉口。

当酒席进行到一半时,丽珍觉得她的头痛又逐渐地来了。

开始,只是轻微的痛,渐渐地越来越痛。

而那连续不断的剧痛有如海浪般涌向丽珍,使到她冷汗直冒,对身旁一切的事物也渐渐失去知觉。

在她失去知觉的一刹那前,她依稀又听到那令她骇怕的狂笑声;由远至近、由断续至清楚。

当她感觉到笑声就在她耳边围绕着时的那一刻,她完全失去知觉。。。。。

在酒席进行到一半之际,美玲发觉到丽珍的脸色变得很难看。

“丽珍,妳怎么啦?”美玲看到丽珍紧锁着眉头似乎在忍受着极大的痛楚。

“妳没事吧?丽珍,妳听到我说话吗?”美玲依靠在丽珍的身旁轻声问道。

忽然,丽珍睁开双眼,口中咯咯的笑着。

与美玲和丽珍同坐一桌的人都不约而同的看着丽珍。

“丽珍,妳做什么?”美玲一边扶着丽珍一边说道。

慢慢地,丽珍的咯笑转为大笑、狂笑。。。

一时之间,每个人都停下筷子转着头朝着丽珍的方向看。

“丽珍,妳做什么?妳不要吓我。”美玲被丽珍的狂笑声,吓得不知所措。

丽珍象是变成了另外一个人似的,只见她继续狂笑着,不停懈的笑着。。。。。

突然间,丽珍站了起来。

只见她在狂笑声中把桌子推倒。一时之间,碗碟着地的破碎声;人们被撞倒的叫喊声;美玲惊怕的尖叫声和丽珍的狂笑声混成一片。

丽珍在推倒一张桌子后并不停手,只见她一桌接着一桌的动手推倒,加上她那骇人的狂笑声,使到在场的人都惊慌失措。

美玲更是吓得跌坐在地上,双脚抖的使不出劲站起来。

忽然在惊慌的群众中走出两个男人,朝着丽珍走去。

两名男人一人一边捉住丽珍的胳膊,以免她在推倒桌子时伤到别人。

只见丽珍双手一拨,两名男人被拨得连连后退,只差没跌倒。

那两名被击退的男人再与另外二名男子又再合力捉住丽珍,但还是无法按住丽珍那巨大的挣扎,而那四名男子也被击得东歪西倒。

此刻,在厨房工作的厨师们闻风后,便一窝蜂的跑出来看热闹。

x x x x x

推倒了四名男人后,丽珍疯狂般飞奔入厨房。到了厨房,她顺手一把拿起放在砧板上的菜刀,然后发出咯咯的狂笑,跑到宴客厅。

“哈。。。。。”

丽珍在宴客厅,疯狂地挥舞着手上的菜刀,吓得在场的人脸青唇白,连忙躲避她的“无情刀”。

美玲见到此状,为之一愕,整个人瘫坐在一旁,不知如何是好,为了避免被丽珍砍伤,几名年老的橱师于是连忙扶起美玲到一旁坐。

“妳没事吧?”一名年纪较大的橱师扶着美玲问道。

“没什么,谢谢你!”美玲颤抖着答道。

“那位是妳的朋友吧?她为什么会这样?是不是神经有点混乱?”老橱师问美玲。

“不是的!她平时很正常,不知为什么今晚会变成这样?”

“看她的样子好象是撞了邪。”

“啊!”美玲听后顿时大吃一惊。

“她最近可有碰到什么不干净的东西吗?”

“对了。她最近。。。”美玲正要对老橱师说丽珍曾不听劝告的踢了那把雨伞的事时,忽然听见丽珍在狂笑声中说了几句话:“哈。。。既然敢踢我,当真不想活了,哈。。。哈。。。”

就在那刹那间,丽珍举起菜刀往自己的身上猛砍。一刀、二刀、三刀,一刀一刀不停地砍,顿时血花溅飞。。。。。

最恐怖的是丽珍似乎并不觉得疼痛,狂笑声并没中断,菜刀还是不停地在她身上起落着。

一时之间,众人都被吓得目瞪口呆,几名女子更是怕的大叫起来。

老橱师见状,马上说道:“快!你们合力阻止她,尽量把菜刀抢过来。阿海,快去厨房找一双红筷子给我,快!”

那名为阿海的橱师即刻飞奔进厨房。

七、八名橱师合力好不容易才制得住发了狂的丽珍。

虽然丽珍身上的伤口,血不停地猛涌出来,她却还在狂笑着。。。。。

==================================================

故事 二 (下)

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七支香 十四个夜晚 鬼魂不再现

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“华叔,红筷子。”阿海从厨房里找出了一双红筷子。

老橱师华叔拿着红筷子夹住丽珍的左手中指,厉声道:“何方妖魔,还不快快离开!”说完双手用力一夹。

只听见丽珍“啊”的一声,昏了过去。

“快,送她去医院。”

众人七手八脚的把丽珍送去医院急救。。。。。

x x x x x

“华叔,你得救救丽珍,她从昨天昏迷到现在,一直都还没醒过来。”美玲在隔天到酒楼找华叔。

“妳从头到尾把经过说一遍给我听吧。”华叔抽着烟说道。

美玲一五一十的把经过说了一遍,然后问道:“华叔,有什么办可以解救吗?”

华叔想了想,说道:“看来只有去求和解,希望她能原谅丽珍年少无知,毕竟错在于丽珍,她不该去踢那把伞。”

“那该怎么办?”美玲担心的问道。

“当丽珍复原后,妳叫她在夜晚十二点去电梯处烧香,同时也必须烧一些纸钱给她,希望她会原谅丽珍。”

“每晚十二点正?”

“不错。而且每次必须烧七支香。”华叔道。

“七支?那丽珍得烧几晚?”美玲道。

“不知道。”华叔摇头说道。

“不知道!那到底得烧多久?难道得永远的在每晚十二点烧香吗?”

华叔慎重的说道:“那得看丽珍的运数了,如果那女鬼能原谅她,就一切好办,如果。。。”

“如果什么?”美玲急问。

“我也不知道,希望她会原谅丽珍。”华叔道。

“那。。。”美玲不安的说道。

“别担心了,我们现在担心也于事无补,妳先去医院看看丽珍,等她醒后再交代她我所说的话。”华叔安慰着美玲。“如果丽珍醒了,代我问候她。”

“我会的。”美玲点头道。

x x x x x

过了几天,丽珍出院回家休养,美玲在当天傍晚把华叔所说的话重复一次给丽珍听。

“十二点!”丽珍睁大着双眼说道:“还得烧七只香,我。。。”

“丽珍,妳别再不信了,妳就听华叔的话吧。如果妳觉得害怕,我。。。我陪妳。”美玲虽然感到害怕,却还是硬着头皮同意陪伴丽珍。

“好吧,谢谢妳。”丽珍想到那夜所发生的事和那一阵阵剧痛不禁感到害怕。

x x x x x

那一夜十二点正,丽珍与美玲双双拿了一些纸钱和七只香到电梯口。

不知是否心理作用,两人只觉得阴风阵阵吹来,四周有说不出的诡异。

“我们应该在那儿烧呢?”丽珍问美玲。

“我也不懂,我看就在电梯里吧。”美玲回答。

“好吧,就在电梯里。”丽珍说完按着电梯钮。

不一会儿,电梯升上来了,只见丽珍与美玲二人脸色都很苍白,只能对着对方勉强的挤出苦涩的笑容。

丽珍一边烧香一边喃喃低声说道:“对不起,有怪莫怪,对不起。”

忽然一阵阴风吹进电梯里,卷起正在燃烧着的纸钱。

丽珍与美玲双双都被吓得叫了起来。丽珍更是吓得连声道歉:“对不起,原谅我吧,对不起。。。”

当纸钱一烧完毕,两人连跑带跳的奔回家去,只留下一撮烧尽的纸灰和正在燃烧的七只香。。。。。

当晚丽珍又做了一个梦。。。。。

“我怎么会在楼下?我到底想去那儿?”丽珍心里不安的想着,一步一步走向电梯。

然后,她又见到那个撑着一把伞的长发女人站在电梯前。

只见她一直看着丽珍,一句话也没说,就这样静静地看着丽珍。。。。。第二晚,第三晚,第四晚,连续几晚十二点正,丽珍与美玲都在电梯里烧香。

很奇怪的丽珍的头疼也逐渐好了。

一连十四晚,丽珍和美玲都准时十二点正烧香。

在第十四晚,丽珍又再梦见那个撑伞长发女人。

不同的是,那位长发女人在看了丽珍一会儿后,便转身慢慢地离开,慢慢地消失掉。。。。。

虽然如今丽珍已不再梦见她,头也不曾再痛过,每个初一十五丽珍与美玲都会在午夜十二点在电梯处烧香。

经过这件事后,丽珍再也不随意得罪或碰触任何具神秘性的东西,毕竟是 “宁可信其有,不可信其无”,而自己本身也的确遭遇这玄妙的事情。。。。。

(故事二完)

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Tuesday, November 08, 2005

狮城怪谈二 (上)

(1989年之旧著)

常言道: “宁可信其有,不可信其无。” 就算你不相信鬼神之说,也不要故意招惹它。虽然你始终不信邪,甚至于认为是无稽之说,可是一旦你亲身遇到,你就会。。。

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故事 二 (上)

碰触电梯里的雨伞、女孩忽患头痛

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“丽珍,妳相信这世上有鬼吗?”美玲忽然问她的好朋友。

“哎呀!当然不相信啦。在这个科学昌明的世界里,那还会有什么鬼魂呢?如果真让我遇到,哈!我一定把它捉来给你看。”丽珍道。

美玲听了大吃一惊,说:“丽珍,妳别乱说话,这些事能不碰上已算大吉大利了,妳竟然还乱讲话。”

丽珍听了不以为然,说道:“别傻了,这世上那会有鬼呢?妳听太多鬼故事了。”

美玲听完摇摇头,说:“这种事很难讲的。宁可信其有,不可信其无。更何况,就算我们相信也对我们毫无坏处,对不对?”

丽珍耸耸肩膀,不以为然:“随便妳,反正我从不相信这些荒谬的事情。”

“。。。”美玲听后默默无言。

x x x x x

美玲与丽珍不但是多年的好朋友也是多年的旧邻居。

美玲怕事,害羞以及胆小。

丽珍刚好相反,从小就外向、活泼和有着天不怕地不怕的性格。

由于两人都还没有男朋友,因此总会在周末的夜晚结伴去看戏,逛百货公司。

在一个周末夜晚,两人和以往一样的结伴去看戏,不料,却发生了一件不寻常的事。。。

x x x x x

“刚才那套戏真怕人。”美玲对着丽珍说道。

“那里会,一点儿也不恐怖,亏妳还嚷得那么大声,真笑死人。”丽珍道。

两人在等电梯时闲聊着。

“妳不觉得恐怖吗?有几段我差点儿不敢看下去。”

“难怪我见到妳闭着双眼。”丽珍作弄着美玲。

不一会儿,电梯门开了。只见一只雨伞横置在电梯的中央。

“丽珍,我们靠边站吧,别去碰那只雨伞。”美玲拉着丽珍的衣袖说道。

“怕什么,一只雨伞罢了,没事的。”说完,就提起脚把雨伞踢到一旁去。

美玲见了大吃一惊,“妳做什么踢它,快点道歉说对不起。”

丽珍瞪着双眼说:“妳说什么?妳发神经啊?真是无聊,我才不怕。”

丽珍一说完,只见灯光忽然闪了一下。美玲吓得“啊”了一声,整个脸色变白。丽珍心里也打了一个冷颤,却还死要面子的说:“就算有事我也不怕。”

就在这时,电梯门开了。美玲与丽珍三步做两步地走出电梯。

丽珍在步出电梯后说:“妳走这么快做什么?电灯只是失灵一下子,瞧妳吓得脸部变白,真胆小。”

美玲拉着丽珍直奔回家,一面走一面说道:“别说了,别说了。”

说完,两人急急离开。

她们并不知道在她们离开后,那只雨伞又再慢慢地,慢慢地移动回原来的地方。

x x x x x

“这是什么地方?怎么静悄悄的?我怎会在这儿?”丽珍一边走一边惊讶的想。
走着走着,景象越来越清楚。

“这儿不正是我家楼下吗?电梯就在那儿。”丽珍想着便走向电梯。

在到达电梯前,丽珍朦胧中见到一人站立在那儿。

“现在都没下雨,那女人怎么撑着一把伞?”丽珍边想边走近她。

在丽珍离她三、四尺时,那位女人慢慢地转过身来。

只见她一头秀发,一双大眼睛流露出很浓厚的哀怨眼神看着丽珍,仿佛有很多话想对丽珍诉说。

丽珍被她瞪得混身不舒服,却无法转过头不看她。

只见她满满地伸出手指指着丽珍,在她口中缓缓地吐出一句话:“妳为什么踢我?”

“我。。。我没。。。”丽珍吓得说不出话来。

那女人忽然厉声道:“还说没有!我不会就此罢休,我会来找妳的,哈。。。”

丽珍就在此惊醒过来。

“啊!原来做了个恶梦。”丽珍抹了抹額头的汗水后又继续倒头大睡。

x x x x x

第二天晚上,和大多数人一样,丽珍坐在电视机前观赏连续剧。

忽然,丽珍觉得头有点疼。起初是小疼,渐渐地越来越疼,直至她忍受不了才去吞了两片止痛药上床休息。

这晚她又做了一个同样的梦,不同的是那长发女人只是对着她笑,一直大笑着,狂笑着。。。

x x x x x

“丽珍,妳怎么了?怎么妳的脸色这样差?”美玲有一晚和丽珍去逛公司时问她道。

“没什么。只是最近每晚都会感到头很痛,开始只是痛一会儿,到最近却时常痛几个小时,吃止痛药也无补于事。”丽珍说道。

美玲听后说道:“我看妳明天还是去给医生检查检查吧,看看到底有什么毛病?”

“只好这样了。”丽珍点头说道。(待续)

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Old Beng : A Pseudonym

Ever since I started my Blog "lim peh ka li kong", I have been writing under the pseudonym of "Old Beng" and other times in Chinese some old articles written some years back.

Friends who know me as I am in reality seem not able to understand that Old Beng is just a made-up character and not able to accept my non-sense tales. The most obvious difference is the numbers of children Old Beng has and his "Fiona look-alike wife" cos in actual life, this is not true.

Oh please, in our fast pace-moving society we are having now, who on earth with a sound mind will have 12 children. I have a friend who has 5 children and for that I really salute him.

So if you are a personal friend of mine, please read Old Beng´s tales with an open mind and do not get confused over the real me in life.

Old Beng : 40 years old married with 12 children and stays in HDB driving a van and working as an office PKL man.

Real me : 40 years old married without children used to stay in HDB driving a car and working as an Executive Operator in the Petroleum Line.

The reason for this clarification is that I am thinking of touching on certain incidents and wanting to share the real life which I am now going through. Who knows, I may even upload some photographs to share.

In other words, whether I am writing my real life incidents or using Old Beng to spice up my articles, I do hope to bring a smile on your face whenever you read them.

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Monday, November 07, 2005

夜 静 思

(十五年前之旧著)

从小就喜欢夜晚,因为晚上才是我真正松懈的时刻。

白昼给我的感觉一向是匆忙的,紧张的,熙熙攘攘的,没一刻平静。

夜晚就完全相反,自己一个人在宁静的小房子里静静地聆听着音乐,或是阅读着一本自己喜欢的小说,真有说不尽的舒适。

夜晚才是真正属于我的,不象白天,必须戴着一副假面具做人,应酬一些自己不喜欢面对的人,做一些自己不想做而又不能不做的事。因此,每当夜晚来临时,总喜欢投向它宁静的怀抱里,享受着它温馨的拥抱。

白天被吵杂声,人声,车声吵得头昏脑胀,只有在夜里才能使头脑平静安宁下来。每当夜静无人的时候,我总是喜欢让思绪毫无边际的奔驰。

人有时是需要让自己静一静,想一想,绝不能日复一日,年复一年的象机械般工作下去,总得为未来做一些打算。

每当夜阑人静时,总有许许多多的问题涌上心头:一会儿事业上的问题,一会儿家庭的问题,一会儿又儿女私情的问题,一会儿又生活上的问题。

虽然问题一箩箩,却还是改变不了我对夜晚的喜爱,尤其在深宵独自一人伴着寂寞,更是人生一大乐趣。对我来说,这是乐趣。

沉思也是另一种享受。总喜欢在夜晚毫无目的,毫无目标的沉思,虽然有时少不免有一些 “强说愁,无病呻吟” 之类的沉思,却不失一份舒坦的感受。

每个人对每件事的定义都不同,对我来说我的人生乐趣,高等享受是在宁静的夜晚里,独自一人静思,仿佛与外边的世界绝隔关系,思想毫无顾虑的自由奔驰。

一个人,一根烟,一个无边无际的宁静夜,就这样静静地,寂寂地独自享受。。。。。

x x x x x

2005 后语:

十五年后的现在,唯一能享有个人空间的时候是在驾车的时候,一个人,一条熟悉的回家路途,饭温菜香,有人在家等着的感觉真好。。。

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Saturday, November 05, 2005

Fart

lim peh ka li kong

People say if you can fart freely in front of another person, your relationship with him/her is far beyond just friend;

Everybody farts. That's an absolute truth, whoever you are, even celebrities fart.

Old Beng's big family usually farts quite a lot due to our preference of food - sweet potato; Sweet potato is a very healthy food but the only set back is that you will tend to fart more. At times, my 12 children can perform a symphony of Fart. (Just kidding)

From what I know, if one were to control his fart and keep it back without releasing it via the proper channel, due to whatever reason, maybe feel shy to fart infront of his friends, lovers, etc he will probably get a bad breath.

Although I encourage one to fart when there is a need but I think there are certain scenarios which are really unsuitable to fart, especially those long, loud and with a pungent smell ones.
  • Climbing stairs in a row
  • Having meals
  • In a concealed and poorly ventilated room
  • Kissing halfway
  • Swimming
  • Big and Serious Presentation to an Important Client

Usually if I were to let go my "German Gas" (wonder why it is called German and not other country) and cannot hide the fact that the source was from me, then I will apologise.

Human nature is such that if one is in a lift, packed with people, nobody will admit that he has just fart. Thus we will just pretend and cover our nose and look around at everybody in the lift even though we are in fact the farter. Too bad if there is only one other person with you in the lift cos there's no way you can hide and pretend.

Last week, me went to the post office to collect some registered articles. There was quite a long queue so me also queue up and wait for my turn.

Half way through I felt my stomach started to rumble. Must be the 3 pieces of sweet potato I ate that morning.

"Phuuuuut!!!" I let out a long, loud fart. Think the counter aunty also can hear my loud fart and everybody queueing in front of me all turned their heads and looked at me.

Me also reacted very quickly, me also turned my head behind to see. You know la, like that means I also not the one who fart and me also want to see who was the unlucky one behind me, ha ha ha clever leh?

Wa-piang! There was nobody standing behind me and I was the last person in the queue.

Then I heard one young teenager boy said," Ai-yo uncle, you are the one who fart la, still want to pretend what" and there was a huge uproar of laughter after that.

Me never felt so pai-seh before one and I think my whole face also turned red, so malu.

I quickly left the post office in a hurry and later got my son to collect the mail instead.

lim peh kong wan liao

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